Caption Calling

"Tring...........Jaago"

"Bang.........Nahiii"

"????..........????"

Take a DEEEP breath ....

Oh so you did take a deep breath isn't it? *counting with fingers* Err well you have to pay 167.33/- for the O2 that you just inhaled! #$%@#$%^% Confused?

You don't have to... things are quite at place at least now. Few days from now there won't be any surprise about paying for the Oxygen that you take in for the very survival.

SC says "Breathing is not a necessity but a habit...."

They say it's even fun now with all kinds of flavours available.

Talk about fun check these -- O2 Bars

ಮೈಸುರು ಜನರಿಗೆ "The ದೊಡ್ದ ಕೊಡುಗೆ"

ಕೇಳಿ ಕೇಳಿಸಿ Life ನಿಮ್ಮದಾಗಿಸಿ

And....

ಅನಿರೀಕ್ಷಿತವಾಗಿ ಇಂದು ನಾ ಕಂಡ ಅಪರೂಪದ ವಿಶೇಷ ಇದು!!! :-)

Double Duniya

########################################################################################


*5:30 AM*


~Rooster went kukudukooo~ and I turned on the flash light of one of my cell phone to check what the time was. Without even taking the trouble to switch on the bed lamp, I used the same flash light to search the other cell phone and to switch off the wake up alarm!


*6:30 AM*


~But all the damage shez done is unfix able~ sang the music player while I jogged up the Chamundi Hills. With the kinda music player I have in one of my cell phone my mp3 players have gone for a toss and the 80GB apple ipod that Santhosh gifted me still lies at my wardrobe unloaded!


*7:30 AM*


~NEHA GUPTA **yrs 02-10-07~ popped on one of my cell phone’s screen I remembered that it was my friend’s birthday. Clicked the right key and the quick navigation thankfully had contacts, pressed number 6 twice which opened names with ‘N’ and a bit of scrolling I got her number. There were days when I used to wish her in the mid night, off course to her land line number used to be at the tip of my tongue.


*8:30 AM*


~Reminder: Pick up the book and CD~ beeped one of my cell phone. New Year is almost around and last year’s diaries and to-do books lay in the store unused.


*9:15 AM*


As I hopped inside my car I remembered that the soft launch of BIG 92.7FM is ON AIR. Now who will ask the driver to switch on the radio especially when dad is also in the car? I switched on the radio on one of my cell phone and ~Nanna stylu berene Nanna looku berene~!


*11 AM*


A Friday and 11am means only one thing; ~new mail received~ and you don’t even want to open it coz all spiZens know that it is of Vedavyas.H.P with the content “Hi all, I request you all to enter your time sheet before 1PM today”. The sizzling pink colour calendar from hutch guys lies in my cube at with the pages still showing August as I look at one of my cell phone for this week date’s breakup.


*1 PM*


After quite a lunch I realize that my dietician told to have a count of the calorie intake I have every meal. Menu  Organiser  Calculator and ~ &*^ + %$& + #%* = *** ~ ; The result again was not penned down anywhere but typed and stored in one of my cell phone’s Menu  Organiser  Notes section.


*4 PM*


Sipping cappuccino at food court along with my colleague; He was sad that he missed one of the recently happened events at office. Switching on the ~Media player with Event.3gp file~ in one of my cell phone, I showed him the whole event that I had recorded when it happened.


*7:30 PM*


~Watch the moon~ beeped a reminder while I was almost at the parking lot. It flashed to me that moon today would be closest to earth and hence would appear the brightest. It indeed was the brightest. ~Click~ and my 2mp camera in one of the cell phone captured the moon. The digital camera I got for my birthday is in my locker since March; should charge it up I thought and again put the same in to-do list for the weekend.

########################################################################################


You must be wondering why I kept mentioning “one of my cell phone” every time I wrote a task. That’s because I have two cell phones. One off course to make calls and the other for the above very few mentioned co-curricular activities!


I began to wonder what reason others would have for having two CP. Not wasting anytime I sent a text message from the other cell phone to few of my colleagues and friends regarding same. I am publishing their replies here!



GTV – “That’s to have 2 girl friends. Number of cell phones is directly proportional to number of girl friends.”


Me -- "That must be the reason all the time he is with phone at office"





BR – “That’s because they have two ears”.


Me -- "So???, 10 fingers and what do you expect?"





SP – “My true answer. One for SMS and one for Talk time”.


Me -- "Satyaharishchandra will be very happy"





SND --


“May be they talk a lot”


Me -- "Can't they talk in one phone then?"


“One for weekdays and one for weekends. (Because situation changes after Friday night *****)”


Me -- "What will change? I have no clue"


“One for incoming and one for outgoing.”


Me -- "Uh-ha... and then...???"


“To give a ring to the other phone when it goes missing, to find it.”


Me -- "What if both go missing? third one?"


“To show people that they are very busy.”


Me -- "By having two cell phones? How ya?"


“One CDMA and other GSM.”


Me -- "Any other tech available?"





SS – “Multitasking – two ears two cell phones. Never miss an opportunity.”


Me -- "Thank god there is only 1, anyways.... forget it"





SVK –


“Just for the craze.”


Me -- "What craze? Mobile or anything else?"


“We can’t keep two sim cards at a time in one cell phone.”


Me -- "Dual cell phone systems are available!"


“Inondhu halka halka kelsa madake.”


Me -- "Adhu thamma janma sidha hakku bidi"





AK –“You can switch off the cell phone when your wife is calling and keep the other one on for your girl friends.”


Me -- "I better report this to akka asap"





NRCD -- "One for girl friend and one for wife"


Me -- "God save all the girls you know"





SS -- "One is boring but two is exciting. Bari ondh cell phone yaakey? eradu edre ne ok"


Me -- "Uppi dialogues elli yaake?"





AG -- "Don't you remember transmitter and receiver? that's the reason! One for transmitting and other for receiving"


Me -- "What? Signals and systems? why that now?"





SR --"One for family and friends the other for official use"


Me -- "Good boy"





HKMN -- "One for local, the other for STD... OMG I need one more I think for ISD"


Me -- "Guess he ran to get another cel phone"





RG -- "Two of them coz they might be both Dog and Rehman lovers. So one for Dog lovers and other coz they are Rehman lovers."


Me -- "What did Dravid do huh? and Priety? and Priyanka? Che che...people love dogs more than Dravid?too bad eh"


And the





goes to

VKM --


*status : single and frustrated*
"What I will do is I will call from one cell phone to my other cell phone and talk in a female voice; I will pick the other phone and respond in a male voice! like this I use my two cell phones so I am not single but committed."


Me -- "No comments!!!"


So what do you guys think?

Bindaas Blue Boys!!!

Almost 14+ days back when he was asked to pose with the Twenty20 Trophy, he let his sense of humor flow — just like his trademark hairstyle — "Do I get to keep this with me then?".





I heard that he is quite a famous person with the media for his instant one line humor that he throws at them every time a bizarre question is asked. Not to forget the sarcastic one-liners too. Boy the best one was when he answered Ravi Shastri after the Australian win "Ravi, we read your article yesterday in cricinfo where you said if India goes with me then Australia are the favorites. We have proved you wrong." The amount of sarcasm stumped Ravi and all he had was a smile [Very difficult one I must say].





For all you poor guessers I am talking about soon to-be-Jharkand Ratna! MSD era has just begun!!











Leadership, he says, is about the response you get from the XI. The response is out in style; with no Mandira Bedi wearing a saree specially designed for India's match or some singer trying to release an album specially for Team India on the eve nor with some one picking Tarot cards to tell who will be having an edge in the match nor an extra innings to help Indian team plan strategy nor did we have specialized coach for different areas and finally, off course no biggies [That also means no cheap politics]





"He’s a captain who has left his fingerprints on the hearts of every member of his team, young and old: prints that say, no fear" quoted a paper.











When some one asked him about T20 World Cup, no less, maybe a chance to redeem pride lost in the West Indies early this year? He said "The basic problem with us cricketers is that we don’t enjoy the game, we get too much into it. I just want my team to enjoy the game. I am not looking at it as a chance for redemption. It’s a fresh start in this tournament".







I'll tell you the best thing about winning and success from my experience:





Today as I still stared at the headlines and the pictures at 4 different papers, my car stopped at the signal. I saw a guy on his bike by the car window! He had few papers with him as well. As the signal ticked down from 90sec the funny game started...

We started showing different newspapers that we had at each other in turns. All of them had pics of the jubilant win off course. He started with "TOI" and I showed "Andolana" a local paper, next he had "Mysuru Mithra", while I responded with "Vijay Karnataka"... This went one for almost a minute and we both were done with all the newspapers. And yes it was a tie :)





We exchanged smiles, and bid byes with thumbs up as the signal light went green!!!

Moral: Sharing happiness with strangers [handsome ones esp.] is more fun: D





Before I sign off a lil bit of philosophy and spirituality!! The couple who initiated the positive thoughts by POSM



Until next time, I am off Celebrating Cricket....

*That's the way Maahi-Wayyyy*

This is me.... Mebbe :)

You are The High Priestess

Science, Wisdom, Knowledge, Education.

The High Priestess is the card of knowledge, instinctual, supernatural, secret knowledge. She holds scrolls of arcane information that she might, or might not reveal to you. The moon crown on her head as well as the crescent by her foot indicates her willingness to illuminate what you otherwise might not see, reveal the secrets you need to know. The High Priestess is also associated with the moon however and can also indicate change or fluxuation, particularily when it comes to your moods.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Don’t seek the truth. Just cease to cherish opinions.

Well, time and again my life some or the other way went like Calvin's....
and So did the spiritual thingie !!

Tadaaaaa, Uh-Ha, I'am BACK :)

I met GOD

For the past few days I was busy, talking to GOD. God helped me realize my capabilities, taught me how to dream and told me he chose me coz I was special. I started dreaming my dream and found life itself is a dream, and sometimes your dreams help you kill yourself. Now I am no more and this is my last post. Yes I have decided not to write anymore. Spirituality is something which will help me kill myself more so I am into it from today!

Thanks to all of you for handling my TORTURES….

Stand-up comedy and Schumi

It was Ralf's wedding celebrations at the Schumachers... and look what happened!!




Schumi was proud of his first ever Best Man's speech at Little Ralfie's wedding. Ralf had warned Schumi beforehand not to mention Jordan and the 'funny' story, and Schumi said he could trust him on this one.
The speech and the comedy went like this:




I looked over at Ralf and Cora, so happy together, and said it was lovely that my brother should have been blessed with a child so early on in his relationship. Then I pulled a comic face. (So everybody would know the comedy moment was coming up)
But why, I said, WHY did he have to name him after one of my greatest rivals on the Formula 1 track? My nephew is now David Schumacher. I said I was not looking forward to Cora getting pregnant again. If she had twin boys I would no doubt be uncle to Kimi and Juan Schumacher!
Everybody is falling about laughing.

Maths Maniac

Sis is involved in too much of algebra these days and has started talking it. This is the conversation mom had with her y'day.



Mom: putta, what's your classmate's name who has long hair.



Sis [solving some equation] : shez not a3, shez not b3, shez not c3.... shez 'Gaya[3]thri'.



Mom : *Blinking*

If TT had any brains, it'd be dangerous

Scene 1:

Its been a common practice off late for TT to call me while she sets a journey everyday from ITPl to her place... and everytime she calls me, I tell her "Gimme 10 min, I'll get back to you".

I never call back...[working too much] and she always complains that the 10mins never arrive.

One evening she calls up and for her luck am free, I pick the call and tell her "Wait for 10 min, start your countdown and I promise I will get back in 10min this time"

I pack things and call her in 9 min, and the phone is in waiting....

TT calls back and says "Wow, you did call up in 10 min din't you? Thats great change!"

Me: "Thats fine but I told you to wait and not talk over phone"
and there came a shocker and yeah a chocker too...

TT: "Ya you told me to wait, so I put the phone in waiting.... Just for the effects"

Me: "No comments".
Scene 2:
TT is getting married to her BF who is doing his MS in the US, this october, and I was trying to find out if the honeymoon is decided or not.
Me: "Hey, whats for the honeymoon da?! have you guys decided place?"TT : "Ayyo after marriage there will a reception in his native and then we get two days which will go by with he packing things"

May be the timing of my question was wrong,
Me: "Shit is it? when is he coming here by the way?"

Quite a desperate TT says "Oh! can I go honeymoon before marriage?"

Wish I could say "Yes" but I said "No wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!"

As I quoted before, TT is my all time inspiration for my posts when I am outta Ideas.. Rock On TT

Mayadhantha Male Banthanna :)

Friends don't ask "Did you watch Mungaru Male?", they ask "How many times have you watched Mungaru Male?". Such is the impact of the movie and am sure the movie needs no intro at all. The popularity of the songs pervades everywhere, and you rarely go without hearing one of them on any day.


Tune in to any radio station or any Kannada television channel and one of the numbers from the film is bound to pop up within 10 to 15 minutes. Barring the rare exception, one in every three songs broadcast is from the film and every request show faces a barrage of requests from fans.
The songs can be heard from car stereos. BPO employees swear that once they enter their cabs, it rains "Mungaru Male". I can say the songs have become anthems for the youth in Karnataka.

Thanks to Nagathihalli Chandrashekar for introducing Manomurthy, NRI, S/W engineer, who has given such lovely music for the movie. The rain is still pouring and pouring cats and dogs mind you.

of the best Kannada films made in recent times. It gives other young film makers and writers immense confidence. There are no cheap comedy scenes, which act as fillers in most of our films today. There are no villains who shout at the top of their voice. There are no songs shot in Switzerland and Malaysia (Karnataka is beautiful too. Watch the movie if you don’t think so!).


Congrats to the whole team and every bit of success is deserving.....
All the very best for upcoming talents...... The biggest appreciation I can offer is by watching them in theatres... Coz thats all it matterzzz

As tall as the Himalayas!!!

Its been more then 3 weeks since dad got promoted as DySP, but the celebrations never seem to end at all. The flowers and the farewells, the wishes through cards and through phone calls, not to forget having guests at home everyday[ Momz having a tough time], its all happening here.



Last night we had Mr.Praveen Sood, Police commissioner, Mysore city and his wife Vinita amongst us for dinner. And among all the guests we had for dinners and lunches, yesterday was a memorable one. Only yesterday I realized that Praveen uncle is qualified with a B.Tech from IIT, Delhi, and an MBA from IIM, Bangalore. It was quite an experience talking with them. While I answered questions related to my work, he spoke about how the process goes on in the Govt. sector. It was great to hear when he said "SPI" is the biggest s/w company in Mysore *collars up*.



While aunty relished amma's south Indian cooking, we spoke about how Mysore has improved due to the genesis of IT sector. Its always great to meet successful people and hear their success stories. For me inspiration plays a very important role, and I learned one thing from the dinner; Being humble and down to earth no matter how big your success story is, will let you focus on further goals and let you repeat the "Success" story again!!!



Its been a common practice for all the guests while they bid us good-bye, "Next time we'll meet you all in her[referring to me] marriage".



And I give them a straight face :-/

Occupational Errors!!

This was taken from the mail that I got from Sachin. Many stuff from here are related to my life in one or the other way, and I'am sure many of you reading will feel the same. Please avoid reading it if you have got a mail from the same "Subject line".

1. This weekend I am looking for a get away of about 200-300 KM car drive. Any idea, what are the places I can visit around Hyderabad? Also, please do provide me with the path.
2. "Also, please do provide me with the path". Side effects of being in the IT field. 'Route' becomes path .!
3. Yeah.. "provide me with the Path" , actually couldn't recollect that the word should be route till u mentioned it…. Certainly occupational errors….
4. The other day I was hearing one guy talking of a "Standalone" house.. when he was actually intending a independent house… Poor broker should have tuff time trying to find a " Alone house standing in a huge empty area… ".Don't know what interpretations the guy must have made.
5. Few years back my shogun engine stopped on Bangalore MG Road as the petrol came to reserve. I told my friend I need to restart my bike!
6. Once I went to have juice at the local juice vendor and asked him whether he had a plain 'version' of nimbu pani.
7. One late night when I went home after work, I was trying to flash my id card to open the lock and only after few secs, I realised what i'm trying to do ;-)
8. Don't you guys ever wonder for you mobile phones not having Cntrl+C/Cntrl+V OR Cntrl+Alt+Del facilities???
9. Once when I was searching for a house, When the owner asked my name, my reply was "Sudheer underscore some" (My id is Sudheer_some).
10. Some times I dial 0 to call while using land line at home!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
11. I go to some place to wash my hands… I just show my hands up and wait for the water to wash it…. :P forgetting I need to turn something on…
12. When I went to a movie theatre from office directly.. I showed the guy at the entrance my ID card and walked in… he had to call me back asking the ticket…
13. And how can we forget the "Ctrl + Enter" effect while shooting mails from home using yahoo/gmail.
14. Few of my friends and myself decided to go out for dinner. The place wasn't fixed yet. I said we shall decide it "run time".
15. And I – after a forty hour marathon in Bhubaneshwar with Powerbuilder, decided to take a break and went to a movie. In the middle of the movie, when I wanted to check the time, I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the silver screen!
16. Me getting a thought of doing an Alt+Tab while switching from a news channel to the DVD while watching TV.

The best experience I had was when I called home and told mom, I want the certain work done by EOD. Poor amma was wondering what EOD is :-)

When headlines turn into headaches

Ooh gossip! We all have done it at one point or another. I’ll just let the cat out of the bag here: Everybody gossips at work. We all have a friend who informs us about other people but doesn’t take it further. And then we have met at one point or another that terrifying person that just gets pure pleasure out of skinning people alive. You know the type, the ones who get this glossy look in their eyes like a kitten on catnip.



*shivering* I draw the line when it stops being funny and just becomes horrifically diabolical. Yeah, it’s all hilarious until it hits (you) between the cheeks. It’s amazing to me how bad news travels fast! Your day could be starting out well until... you hear from a friend who told another friend, that you did you know what, you know where, with you know who! Then it all stops being funny. Sure, for everyone else it’s just humorous. But it’s never the same for the individual being talked about. There is nothing funny about being under the spotlight for everyone to focus on and enjoy as they pass each other the dinner roll at the table.



Don’t even try to object gossips at work, even if you don’t do it now you’ve definitely done it before. This goes for me as well. It’s just human nature, especially when you get comfortable in a work environment and start to become friends with your co-workers. However, participating in this kind of activity can be extremely dangerous to your career.

Why? How much harm can come from an innocent comment? Here’s the short answer: Tons (I know, enlightening). The biggest danger when gossiping is not what’s actually being said, but who ends up hearing it. .



What’s the solution? Obviously, you can still talk to your co-workers about both work and non-work related topics. However, when you are talking, just run your thoughts through a filter before you speak them. Basically, if you wouldn’t feel comfortable saying them with all your co-workers around, you probably should reconsider saying them. Things are still going to slip through the filter, but you’re much less likely to be looking for a new source of income anytime soon with it on.



I think the extent and closeness of the gossip is what’s most harmful. As long as it’s not a harmful comment, meant to hurt someone’s reputation, it’s OK to chat up a bit. And really, there’s a fine line between just wanting to know how someone’s doing and wanting to get dirt and shovel them up.Until next time Shhhhhhhhhhhh!!

The mirror? The wall? The self?

Archu how'ru



Not bad, not bad and you?



Hey not bad at all, been busy?



Yes quite and you?



Kind of what you been



Nothing much, nothing much but been busy and you?



Nope, nothing, not really nothing, but yeah... nothing.Nothing huh?



How's the family?



Good good been good.



How's the folks?



Yeah yeah nice, nice, real nice.



Hey! I gotta get going real busy, nothing really but you know..



Ya Archu take care.



You too Archu.



Bye




This is the transcript for every single conversation I've had recently.
I don't know why I even bother with 'messengers'. The most common conversation here would be "How are you? Did you eat? See ya..". Would it be better if we just ignored each other, rather than want to finish a conversation as soon as it starts? And why? We got to stay in touch right? With all these gizmos, you would think we would be getting closer..I'm included when I say that a lot of us take each other for granted.

Where are we heading???

I happened to see this pic recently and all I wondered was, "where is tech heading towards?". Though its based on humor lines. But otherwise, the gizmos,apple lappies,palmtops.....Once am into family life am sure my kid would feel present mobile phones a junk mass.

Rang along Bang

Remember trying to tap the bubbles when you got anything new at home? yes the packing material 'Bubble roll' ! I still cherish those childhood days when me & my mom used to have competitions as to who will tap the bubbles more.

Talk about multitasking: bubble packaging can be a protective packing material, a noisemaker, or a stress reliever. It can hold your Easter eggs in place for decorating too. And now, it can even help you paint them. First, coat a piece of bubble packaging with acrylic paint, then roll your egg over the paint, holding it by the ends.Let the paint dry, then repeat with another color, if you like.

Talk about painting, I came accross 'colored bubble wrap' . Why Colored Bubble Wrap?Thats coz Presentation makes a difference! Build a Brand ! Make a Statement ! Stand out from the crowd ! Why use plain Bubble Wrap ; when Color is the same low price as clear and adds character ! Try it and watch the response you get from your customers !
Colors will not run or rub off on your product! Rangeela everyone!!!

SUji wa DOKUshinsha ni kagiru !!

Confused with the title??? That's a Japanese sentence & abbreviated word outta this sentence is 'SU-DO-KU'. The caption simply means "only single digit allowed".



Gone are the days when people read newspapers while they did the most relieving job in the world. Now its time to let your passions play while you enjoy!! For all those obsessed Sudoku players now you can even play in the bathroom on your toilet paper. That’s right it’s the world’s first Sudoku Toilet Paper Roll. It costs $13 for approx. 240 playing sheets.



I only hope, people after all, don't forget the entire motive behind the 'toilet paper' with the excitement of solved su-do-ku's..... Until next time, keep shitting...errrrrr keep solving & yes keep cleaning....

You think it, Tattooists Ink it

They're created in various shapes and sizes, and they come in different colors.Men ranging from professionals and businessmen to professional athletes and rock stars absolutely love them. What are they? (Not so fast boys, I know what you're probably thinking, but you'll be surprised to find out that the answer doesn't bounce)
The answer is tattoos, and people from around the world have adored them since 12,000 BC.



Tattoos are no longer taboo -- they've been part of mainstream culture for some time now and it's clear that they're here to stay.
When it comes to tattoos, bigger is not necessarily better.Am sure the man in this picture doesnt believe in this quote.



People use bodyart as a medium to reveal their sense of pride or to underline important milestones or aspects that marked their lives (literally), such as a newborn baby, a lover, or a religious belief. Whatever the reason, there's no denying that many people get a tattoo simply because they think it's cool and looks good.



Bodyart is something personal to every individual. This man mebbe had too many milestones, or mebbe he had one tattoo everytime to mark the milestone of the previous tattoo. Whatever be the reason please don't let this man enter a kindergarten,coz kids will start playing with crayons & face instead of crayons & paper.

& Now for something completly different and exciting..

Literally born into the spotlight, she was the first baby to be born on Canada's 100th birthday, earning her the title of "The Centennial Baby." Her landmark birth was chronicled in the local newspaper and her parents, Barry and Carol, were awarded with cash prizes for her birth. Any guesses? *Wid her PIC displayed am sounding Dumb asking this question* Never mind, Shez Pamela Denise Anderson.Born in Ladysmith, British Columbia, on July 1, 1967. Few people are born with "Celeb" status. *Tsk Tsk*


Acc to recent sources Pammy feels "Dumb and proud". She loves her "Dumb Blonde" tag.The actress admits she loves the fact people think she's stupid - because it means she has nothing to live up to. She revealed: "That's the best part of my charm. When you have nothing to live up to, you can't disappoint anyone. I love that dumb blonde image because I have nothing to prove."



Well making such statements like "acting dumb is her intelligence", is D dumbest thing to do. She doesnt have to act dumb. She IS already one Moron.






P.S : This is the most decent PIC I got & its not put up to increase my Blog Traffic.

CUT CUT CUT

Our office is having a lovely garden & the grass is a soothing sight. Few days back they[gardeners] were chopping the grass. Soon we realized it was being chopped for the surrondings of our newly constructed Food court.



Frustrated with the "Cut n Paste" job shez doing since 2 months, my colleague said "Even gardeners do the CUT n PASTE job, i.e. cut garden grass & paste it around food court, we & they are same"

Globally Innovative

On our way to Irpu we stopped over a restaurant for Bfast, I noticed this Globe outside the hotel. Din't give much thought about as to what it was. But after a gr8 bfast,I started the "Discovery" with the globe thing. Its basically a STD/ISD booth. Simple way of conveying to the users that they can make calls to anywhere in the globe. The funny part was that, I was not able to locate Ireland & sis told me that its outta my reach/capacity.

Short for what??

For years, companies have managed to sell their products by making you believe you need their products, because obviously there are many things wrong with you!
Do you stink? Are you bald, depressed and impotent?Are you too fat? Too thin? Too ugly?

They don't say how short,

or too short for what,

nor do they explain what their product is, or how whatever they're selling will make me taller.

You know it's a
Top Secret Method

Wanna impress?

Worried about how to impress love of your life? Or how to make her feel special? Forget diamonds [well you can include that was well] .Herez introducing a simple way,If & only if she eats eggs!!

Ingrediants :

Eggs

Heart shaped cookie cutter

Frying pan

Spatula

1.Heat up a pan with a little bit of oil. Set your cooker to a low heat so that you don’t burn the eggs.

2. Place your heart shaped cookie cutter in to the center of the pan with the smooth side down, so as not to scratch the pan.

3. Crack an egg and pour it in to the center of the cookie cutter. The white will want to slip under the cutter, so hold it down to ensure a clean edge.

4. If some does escape, use a spatula to remove any excess egg from the outside of the cookie cutter. Remove the cookie cutter and let the egg cook for a few more seconds.

5. Carefully remove the egg from the pan with a spatula and pop it on a plate with the rest of the whateve u prepare

Hope you all will like the way to impress that is!!!! cheers