Back to School

If god granted me a wish of going back on time, I would prefer the one when I was in 9th grade. I have no second thoughts about it. What’s so special about that year you may ask? That year was laughs, laughs and only laughs.

June 1st 1998, the first thing the class realized was that the class teacher was “Rashid”. He was a terror; I mean he would try to get creativity out of every single person in class even if the student dint like his own talent. According to him everyone in the class should come first, all 80 of us had given names for “singing competition” (thankfully that year due to lot of unplanned holidays, portions were on toss and hence it was not held on stage). I still know all the elements of the “periodic table” coz he made us draw & paint them on those big KG card boards, colorfully. Oh also all of us in the class had to have a stainless steel scale, so that he could take our scale and hit us. He believed in hygiene, what if someone had allergy & when he hit that diseased person, the scale touched him and then hit someone else?

The staff was one funny bunch; the clerk in the office put on so much weight every year that her chair had to be changed.

Rashid didn’t like the management and the management didn’t like him; we the students were scapegoats. Charles always skipped his English class and my diary read “Charles sir did not take class” on that day. Rashid forced us to write such stuff on our diaries.

Chondamma’s look when she saw two people of different sex talking, like as if they were doing it.

The Sanskrit classes took a major hit, Nanda Kumar resigned after teaching us slokas the humming way, then came G.Bhat, who read only “ladies” magazines like “Women’s era” and quoted all that he saw in them. The boys would go “Ooooooooooooo” and all that in the class which could be heard till the Staff room. He was fired for bad behavior and then came a tiny lady who was Suhas’s aunt and she took tuition. She gave full marks to her students consisting of entire class except me and Neha. “How cheap”, we both thought.

In between all this lot of basketball, throw ball, some studies too happened.

The staff also had their favorite dialogues that they repeated all the time. I’ll quote the ones I remember,

Sahaya Raj (Principal) –

1. “Who is the monitor of the class? Write 5 names and come to my office”
2. “Who is the monitor of the class?” someone stood up & he says “you are not the monitor but man eater of the class”

Christopher (Social & Eng teacher) –

1. “You bugger, you are fit to be in gutter, but accidentally you are here.”
2. “I’ll jump on you and kick in your stomach” (I wonder with that EPND belly that he had, how on earth he could do that)

Mukundan (Art teacher) –

Listennnnn, art is a skillful media, listennnnn, art is, listennnn, art is a skillful media through which creative ideas are expressed. (For 3 long years he said just this)

Swathi (Biology teacher) --

Species {Blah Blah} Species {Blah Blah} Species {Blah Blah} & I used to doze off. Excuse me; it was the 1st period post-lunch. What else can you expect?

On day I counted the # of "Species" she used, just to stay awake and I got 118 for just 40 minutes!!!

Glady’s (English teacher) --

This was addressed to myself and Neha when we were trying to form sentence out of the word “astonished” - “I am astonished to see how girls like you can behave so badly in the class?” (She told this just because we were talking, what rubbish)

Also she made Neha sit on floor and the next day princi changed the teacher and Neha was back on the bench.

Maids and thier Honors

The cook is such an integral part of our my life. From bed coffee to a glass of milk after dinner, she takes care of everything and everyone. She has been there in this place since my MIL came as a new dulhan. She was sent as part of dowry may be :)

She knows where the noodles packet is, whether the bananas are ripe or not and what is out of stock.

The first time she took leave, I was making helping MIL make “rotis”. My fingers somehow kissed the hot pan and I had a terrible blister on my forefinger for 3 days. Next when she took leave, I was chopping onions for the garden salad and I cut my ring finger. When I say cut, read it as “deep cut”. The garden salad was less green and more red. Now she has taken 3 days off and all the scrubbing of utensils has caused the skin on my fingers to tear up. I guess it’s the detergents doing the harm on my soft baby like palms.

Final Verdict is that my hands love the dining hall & obviously hate the kitchen.

My mom though is lot cleverer. She has 3 non-resident maids. There is one exclusively for cooking and groceries shopping, another for washing utensils, gardening and last one for laundry & cleaning home. So if one of then don’t turn up, she has a back-up. Also these maids are much synchronized; they talk to each other and make sure they assign their work to another in their absence. Mom, is a good project manager; of the project HOME.

I am off to rub some moisturizer on my hands; you guys take care and make sure you are in good terms with your maid. ALWAYS

What do women want?

Of so many things that she aspires, the most important thing is a “normal” life. Not a life which is defined as “pre-marriage life” and “post-marriage life”

She wants genuine happiness in her dad’s eyes when he takes her in his arms for the first time and not that tension filled eyeballs thinking her as a burden.

She wants her mother to be blessed by her grannd parents for the healthy baby delivered and not a curse for giving them a “girl child”

She wants equal education her brother gets and not just some random degree for the matrimonial market value.

If she is lucky and gets all the above that she wanted then she wants a husband like her father and in-laws like her grandparents.

She wants to learn cooking so that she can feed herself and not gaining those extra points for her culinary skills, from the groom.

She wants to be herself and not someone else who according to the society will be the “first choice” of any guy.

She wants her to be taken to a new house without price tagging her.

She wants to be a daughter and not a daughter in law.

She wants respect for what she is, for she is someone who will keep all her happiness at stake for her family.

This is my entry for the BlogAdda’s What Woman Want contest

Yeh Aaj Kal Ke Bachche!

There are 6 subjects of homework to be done within 3hours. The child after much cribbing settles, pulls books out from his bag and starts the task. Mom is beside him reading a book, 10 minutes done; he tries to erase, drops the eraser and goes searching for it. Few minutes pass and mother realizes that the kid isn’t in his seat. She yells and he returns with the eraser. Then starts the work again, few minutes rolls and he starts staring at the book mom is reading. Mother shouts to continue, while the phone rings. He jumps to pick up the phone and 30 minutes are passed. Again he is pushed back on the study table, starts the homework, writes three words and displays a broken pencil. He starts sharpening, the flower like waste flows out of the sharpener and he is amused. He collects the waste, makes circles of them, writes on them, hears mother yelling from the kitchen & starts the homework.


30 minutes later, mom is done with dinner, comes to check the status and finds kid sleeping peacefully.

Mom does the HW.

What is wrong with you Yeddy?

While there is corruption doing the “Tandav dance” (better than the one in Raavan), you are listing all the times when the upa-lokayukta wasn’t appointed?

For the sake of power you are making Karnataka come on top in terms of sleaze. You slept when they made you push Shobhakka out of cabinet and Mysore, you snored while they blackmailed you for better positions.

This is it, pinch yourself; Wake up Yeddy, for a better you, better us and a better Karnataka.

Film: Raavan

Dus Sar Ka Headache

Bad looking man kidnaps great looking dancer

She cries and yells but is not scared
Girl’s cop husband is not happy; he kills bad man’s men and shouts “Beeeeraaaaaaa” real loud
Now bad man is not happy; he kills cops and shouts “Ssssss Ppppp” more loud
Girl tries to escape, again gets caught, and prays to some sleepy broken lord not to make her weak.

In between there are shouting singers, lot of rain, bad costumes (Sabya actually made Ash wear white after she came out of captivity, white as in sign of purity) and dark jungles!

Too much of “buck buck buck” in the first half, which pushes the audience out and asks them to not to return. Those who braved the initial 60 minutes and still sat munching popcorn, somewhat get a storyline post-interval.

The only thing I loved about watching the movies, was this new flavor of popcorn, cheese n chilly. Oh & the movie, you may want to skip it and watch “The Karate Kid” instead, Jackie Chan looks great and Jade Smith has acted kicked extraordinary.

Raavan: 2/5

You're the Best

Dear Dad,

Whatever decisions that you have taken till date, for me & my life, no matter I liked it or not, they have always proven great for me.

Thanks for each one of them.

Love
Paapu

Vroom

Hubby’s fat hike calls for a celebration; now that I am mobile and also can talk.

We are off to Bangalore this weekend

Some fun at the new mall, Chinese at Kormangala and Raavan on Sunday are the highlights. Oops I forgot the shopping spree!!!

Chikamma has promised a great lunch; it’s been a while we have tasted her haath ka khaana.

Should be fun; tada and be good you guys

So Sick

One damn machar can screw away a lot many lives I tell you. I mean of all the parties dad had to attend one of those lawn parties, get bitten by the mosquito and come back home with high fever.
Now mom being the lovely wife, took good care of him, called the doctor who declared it was “chikungunya”, wrote down the medicines and the blood test that was asked to be done, took him to the lab and by the end of two days, not only did she take the pain but also the disease along. So she lies in one room, yelling in pain and dad in another, to top that my dear sister has final exams. So I became the good girl, took responsibility and started the nursing job.

Preparing special food for the patients, taking them to the doctor, collecting the blood reports, giving correct medicines at right time and attending to the guests who came visiting by, I did all. When they were on own, walking with support, I said “there are other tasks I need to fulfill” and came back to in-laws. Only to fall ill though; to miss the much awaited toastmasters charter ceremony where I had to give my first icebreaker speech. There was this painting competition for which I had held the brushes after long time, yeah that too was given a miss. The gym regime went to dogs and my trainer thought I quit after his constant torturing.

Worst still the same time hubby had to get a fat hike and I was literally bed ridden to celebrate even with a hug. The weekend plan to Bangalore was cancelled and Pati labeled me always-falling-sick-girl.

As of now there are no joint pains, no fever and no shivers but all that antibiotics have left 1, 2, 3….9 mouth ulcers on the tongue, lips and gums. I am now using my own sign language which no one at work understands but they are happy that I am silent.

& for the last time, no the weather is not romantic, it’s sick. It’s making people fall sick and I don’t like it that way.

Edited to Add: I almost watched all the star-plus soaps, felt happy that the story is almost the same since I got married and have given them a skip, saw the live, re-run of ZND and yeah got pampared by MIL to the core these 4 days.

Jai Ho Movie Magic

Whenever a movie is on TV, I recall all the reminiscences associated with them. Movies according to me are not just for entertainment, not just to be seen & verdict as hit or flop, nor are they for time pass. They are the key to memories, to a very large extent. Ok lemme explain

Chandini
I & my late mama watched this flick together when I was in 3rd. We loved the songs to such amount that while on the way home we picked up the “Tips cassette”. Oh also I loved the fancy plain very thin see through chiffon Sarees & well matched 2 dozen bangles, Sridevi wore. So on mom’s birthday I made her brother gift the same kind of Saree along with the bangles for her birthday. Now that mama is no more that Saree is the most possessed gift mom says.

Akasmika
This is only movie that has dad’s presence. He is not a movie person & makes sure everyone in family abides by his take on cinema. I wonder what struck to him that day; he took me & mom for this version. May be the name of the movie itself defines the cause.

Jumanji
The only movie that we watched standing; yeah that’s correct you read it right. Initially when the seat lafda started we thought we better rush back home, but once the action started there was nothing to be said. It needed standing ovation & viewing as well. Guess it was me, Sanki and his dad.

Indian
This cannot be forgotten mainly because this was the first Tamil movie watched in theatre and also happens to be my sister’s debut movie in theatre. It was me, sis, Deepakka, Sanki and his dad crew. Pre interval it was us asking “what did he say” question and the second half sis crying that she needs to go home, that left uncle with nothing.

Kathegalu Sir Kathegalu
Going by the earlier two movies that had similar crew and forgetting that sequels are usually screwed up, we, the family of 13 landed to the theatre. This was after a tiresome 3 days excursion, so most of the members including me ended up sleeping for solid 45 minutes while it was running. I guess no matter how bad the movie is I have always sat in the theatre backing up my choice of the movie and never dozed off. This was an exception, hence needs a listing.

Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham
Being in 12th marks the peak of studies, & those were such days. N, a good friend of mine pestered me that we should see it 1st day 1st show. Although the theater owner is a family friend, I couldn’t ask for tickets obviously that would reach dad. We made it to the theatre by 8am, stood in the hot sun, got tickets and viewed the movie. Of course just this is not worth making to this memorable list, it’s the after part. That night dad brought a good print DVD of the same movie. The initial flash-back part of the movie is in B&W, so the DVD started playing it the same way. Mom thought the TV went off with the color & panicked, so I told her, relax ma it’s actually in B&W. How do you know was the question, of course I had an answer ready that someone who saw the movie narrated it. “They told that the flash-back is in B&W?” asked mom. Now you know why it’s remembered.

Khushi (Kannada)
It was engineering, & all my pals had gone home as it was a long weekend. I was down & out emotionally for some reason, so SN, a friend of mine, instead of going home, cancelled the tickets & took me for the movie. Going by the title the movie did lift my spirits and so did the friend’s nice gesture.

MunnaBhai M.B.B.S
Even though I had already watched the movie on the DVD, it was special in many ways. It was the first time I went out with Pan. I was literally on a different world & good that the movie was already viewed; else it would be difficult choice. I mean to view the movie or talk with pan. It was also the first movie in the capital city.

Kallarali Hoovagi
After grandma passed away grandpa has quit watching movies in the theatre. I somehow convinced him about this, made him step into the cinema world after 10years. He thoroughly enjoyed the flick, thanked me & sister for choosing it for a watch. It was an emotional moment as the flower on grandma’s photo fell down while he spoke to us, just like it happens in movies.

Traffic Signal
Totally opposite of the MunnaBhai version; to be specific it was our last, hence will always be cherished.

Gaalipata
After R made it to Ireland, this movie was a part of the treat. It was later combined with awesome lunch aunty made, & not to forget the dress she gifted me which though old yet is my favorite.

Budhivantha
The motive was to watch “Duniya” which has a second release in town as the first time it was missed. Me and A, set out to the cinema hall mentioned in the paper, but when we reached shock awaited us. The movie was lifted & we had to watch this movie. Thank lord it turned out to be a good swamake film.

Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi
Pati took me to the classic after we got officially hooked up. What a movie to start with I tell you, the entire family laughed their hearts out hearing the choice & the co-incidence. To mark it more memorable, it was a surprise as the initial first date did not have this in the itinerary. I was blushing when I saw the ticket which is typically not me.

There are hundreds more, but a blocked ticket for “Raajneeti” calls me as of now. So it’s Jai Ho to Bollywood, Sandalwood, Kollywood etc.

We Need Change

Boredom occurs when change is not constant; best example would be “The daily work – home” schedule. One can easily get tangled in the work-home routine; the everyday life will then seem to have ordinary stuff, the neighbor who sings loud when you are trying to sleep the extra 5 minutes, the trainer at the gym who burns thinks he burnt all the flab from your abs, the old potholes in the road, the 60 sec traffic lights that always blinks red, the security at the entrance who yells at the tone “ID dekhayiye madam” to the chair which has taken your weight for so many years now, that pleads the Almighty for a more lighter you.

The trainer will not welcome you with a glass of mango milkshake nor will the government fill the potholes, some random guy said don’t change the world, change yourself, so why not modify the current lifestyle on your own?

Try asking the neighbor to shut up & if that doesn’t work out pelt stones err I mean close the window, pop in some cotton plug to your ears & lengthen the snooze time to 10 minutes. The days you wake up late don’t hit the busy gym and wait for people to step down the thread-mill, start your favorite dance numbers & dance away to glory, sweat it that way to burn the calories.

For the roads, just close your eyes & evoke some imagination, guess the distance and the location of the vehicle just by experiencing the gear changes, the humps and the signal stops. Well don’t try this if you are driving though.

Dont be another Obama shouting "We Need Change", be the change and spice up your life.

Akele Hai Tho Kya Gum Hai???

Dammit. It’s so hard to find the “me time” these days. It is tumba essential by the way. One can solve a lot many pending decisions that time. Breathe away in lots of free space. Talk to self with no one thinking it’s insane. More importantly, you don’t have to pretend or act. Just be yourself, will be the statement.

Ya as I was saying, it’s tough. The bleedy phone starts to ring and it will be that old friend of yours who calls up once in a blue moon coz she is busy and all that. You got to pick up & get updated with lot many things that matter more than the solitude Gossip. Or it’s the online book store which refused to pick your call for 5 long days after taking up an important order to ring up. You are left with two choices, either sacrifice isolation for few minutes or get isolated without your favorite book. Sister who is never emotional sends a sms saying that she is feeling alone and needs you. You don’t want to screw up the lovely elder sister for 19 years thingie.

So choices are made.
& I am still craving for that seclusion, I tell you.

But as they say, Loneliness is a special enjoyment when chosen by ourselves but hard to digest when gifted by others. Been there done that so I guess this is FINE.