Hello All

It is that time of the year again. Annual Day at work.
Too busy running around things, & hence the absence.

While you guys are here, why don't you mail me what your new year plans are?

Film: The Dirty Picture

Well. Well. It’s been ages since I wanted to re-watch a movie & this, this movie, has waved that magic. Why? I will not repeat the “Entertainment”-wala dialogue & bore you guys to death, its Vidya – for whatever that was covered & not shown all this while, is displayed fully, in all angles possible, & not even an inch of it is vulgar. Sexy – yes, Offensive – Nope. It is her movie all the way not with the looks but with the character she portrays. & apart from her it is Rajat Aroraa’s script that leaves you speechless for a minute & the next minute you want to stand up & whistle. Finally director Milan Luthria aptly depicts Silk's struggle in a male-dominated industry, without hampering her personal space.

I have always fancied suicidal stories, & that curiosity initially dragged me to the movie. Of course Pati didn’t complain. Movie starts with a little village girl telling her mom that she wants to get into the movie buzz. & a day before her wedding she runs to TamilNadu, to try her fate. Between also starts “I-am-a-man-&-you-are-single-come-sleep-with-me” saga. She is brave enough to handle that. She takes up a small “whip” sequence & soon turns into a sensation, the silk sensation. Adding to that is her romance between the Kant, yeah Kant & not “C” brothers, that turns into enmity soon. As the opportunities start to depreciate, she finds alcohol as company. The silence starts to kill her & she decided to produce a movie, that later gets doomed. Just when something nice is about to happen, she decides death is the best.

Naseerudhin Shah looks what he needs to be looked. Tushar Kapoor is the weakest link in the movie (especially when he *tries* to dance). Emraan, looks convincingly hot. Nyla is the Shobha De? Rest of the crew is not worth discussing. Oh wait, that background nakka nakka is awesome. Bappi Da, the golden man has done it again. All in all, Dirty is the new Beautiful.

Film: Saarathi

This movie happened a while ago, writing is a little late. With apologies let’s start, the only reason I went to this movie was to pass time. & that for a long time (after Paramaathma mishap) not even one good movie was watched. Post Darshan episode, whenever I see him talking about women, respecting them in his movies, there is a weird feeling. That he is faking it, & “his acting is very natural” image is tarnished.

Darshan is riding autos, returning packages that were forgotten, fighting villains who break glass having ShankarNag’s photo, making police realize the amount of halkaness in them & having nightmares about killing his father. Meanwhile heroine is met, songs are sung, love starts & on the day of proclaiming, she is taken away by her sodharamaava to their heritage villa ayyo village.

Hero reaches village in search of heroine, a typical *who fights this goon gets the girl setup* & hero obviously wins it. After much ado, it is realized that hero is son of that village soil, who was misquoted of killing his father by his own chikappa whose son is going to marry heroine & heroine was already hero’s wife with parents exchanging vows when they were playing kunTabille. (anna ivLe nin sose)

Fights, fights & more fights. The reality is known to villagers who will kill chikappa & his son. Hero & heroine marry.

Full marks to Dinakar was an awesome swamake story (al though parts of it have been flipped from Telagu movies), neat direction (I hardly found any flaws), Darshan best in stunts & amazing dialogue delivery, Deepa – no comments (kindly stop taking her into your movies), whoever did the sets – great work, music hummable.

Any day better than Paramaathma

Why this Kolahala?

It’s a racist song. Yes that “white & back” song. That so called soup song; these tamizh guys keep bluffing about their language, how it is rich, BodhiDharman did that & this, yet they came up with soup song-aa? Why? Don’t they know its part of North Indian thaali?

OK agreed, some random guy wrote the lyrics as soon as Aishwarys (as Big B wrote Rajnikanth’s daughter) said that this song has to be fun-filled in ten minutes, & Dhanush in full feeling sang, why deliberately reveal it? & then claim, ashooo that was accidentally stolen & leaked. You have no confidence in your tune & lyrics & singer?

& all this million hits are total tricks. Post recording, & fake leaking the song, the daughter-aLiya duo went home & checked the views. Zero. Dhanush became sad & Rajni had to pitch in, his one click is equal to whatever hits on the page now *insert some na oru time something-something dialogue*

You so called we-wont-talk-in-other-languages-other-than-Kannada-in-November people, shame on you. Why are you listening, re-listening, downloading, and sending others via email, Bluetooth? Just flag hoisting is your Kannada prema is it? How much more baTTehari on this song huh? KannaDambe will never forgive you.

With much disappointment, I am off. To write “thiLi saaru” song. Bye

Which way? This way?

P.S: People with “why don’t you try GPS?” views are forbidden from reading this post.

Life is journey, you should know your destination & all they say, which are famous quotes but what they did not speak about is on “finding the address” to reach the end point. I have problems. Of course we all have, but I am speaking about “address seekers” & “address providers”, yeah “idhe. illi khanditha ondu samasye idhe” situation.

So many (read all) address seekers, stop their vehicles in the “middle” of the road all of a sudden!! Hello losers, kindly show hand signal & stop, halt at the extreme left side of the road, & ask someone around. Its not that you find people & you just stop, no! You park your car, get your ass off the vehicle & ask the address. That’s how it works

& what’s with people, who halt thier vehicle, won’t even bulge from the driver’s seat; yell at top of their voice “24^th main yel baruthe”. Idiot, should the person doing you the favor come near you, smile, say hi & tell you the address? Why being so lazy?

Next worst set of people are the ones who stop at the signal light & ask address. Ones at the left are a little ok ok, but there are ones who are at the middle of the road, asking someone next to them which way to go, when the signal turns green thereby blocking the entire traffic behind them.

Too much worst are the ones who horn, & horn like crazy from behind, & if when you leave way, over take & come by your window (still driving remember) & ask the address. They totally freak me out. So stupid, it’s like they want to travel in the108 free ambulance & for that we will do anything idea. You die, why kill us?

If you are lost, almost going to die, & there is just one lady who could tell you the address & save you, still don’t. Never ask “a woman” address, period. Mikidhu nimge biTidhu.

In Chennai, actually in TN, if they say, go straight & take a right, then left, then left, you do the opposite. You go straight, take left, then right & again right. Voila, you will reach perfectly. But if you make a mistake of following what they say, you could be looping; that too infinite.

You hear to the address & never watch. As in hear the directions but never see where the hand moves, it will surely confuse you. The person says “take right” & bends his hand towards left. Always. So just stick to the oral way.

It’s a no-risk to ask the auto drivers, provided yours & his vehicles share the same state registration number. If your vehicle number says “KA” and his auto number starts with “TN”, you are gone. It’s like Guindy flyover. Round & round & round, uff thale suthu.

Also never go near a bus stop, where there is a huge crowd yelling the place you wanna go “Bangalore Bangalore Bangalore”. Chances that they might think, you are putting seat to your car & ask “200 saaar, please drop me” (Personal experience err not me Pati’s)

Then there are certain awesome people, who when asked address say “follow me” & take you there. They have taken “help strangers” advice from their teachers at nursery a bit too seriously. 

Oh got a call, someone calling to ask address. Ta

BabyB

IT’S A GIRL!!!!!! :- )))))  - tweeted Abhishek. & thus started the paparazzi!!

Of the tiny soul, that doesn’t even know what lies ahead of it. It’s not even few hours old & has already been fed err force fed its share of love & hatred, both in equal quantities.

Information is wealth, yeah, but Indians need too much information. It’s a baby girl you tell, they wont congratulate you instead as “How many kgs”, “Delivery was normal or C-section” yada yada. For all these years this is what their expectations were, & hence media, maniac media was born. They wouldn’t mind climbing trees, hitting people, creating a stampede to get visuals & footage, just to claim they showed it first err on TV. Exclusive is the new mantra.

Ever since this revolution happened, people are force fed with news, & now they don’t like it (at least people I know with); they crib on how channels are funny on breaking news.

I say, everyone is in a state of confusion, no one actually knows what they want. When we get less we thrive for more, when we get more we vomit.

P.P.S: Wishing the mother, best of motherhood & father, err sleepless nights.

P.S: Hello mr.ACP (not my dad) yes I know you are a proud Indian, so am I! This is just a write-up :- )

BadkoLo Body

P.S: November post err strictly Kannadigas only. Rest wouldn’t understand

No pa, this is not a post on Jayalalitha/Karunanidhi/TamilNadu/KaveriNammadu. This is about a person who needs no introduction. But still I will take the ಕಷ್ಟ. He started his career as a sweeper err actor in some random movie, then started his “not-so- ಹಿತವಚನಾ” on ನಮ್ಮ ಅನಿತಕ್ಕನ್ channel. Then collected money in the name of some ಹೋಮ, got kicked out of the channel, joined ಸುವರ್ಣ & now is in zee ಕನ್ನಡ . The famous "Body ಭ್ರಾಮಾಂಡ", yeah Narendra Babu Sharma a.k.a known as "Dumma"

See initially when the show started he sat on a single chair, then they had to get him those ಮದುವೆ ಮನೆ bride-groom chair, now he fills completely into those wedding reception sofas, next I guess ಶಾಮಿಯಾನ-ನೇ ತರಬೇಕು. 

He was the pioneers in the "ಜನರ ಕಣ್ಣಿಗೆ ಮಣ್ಣು ಎರಚುವ" ಆಟ. He said "Keep a lemon in a glass of water & place it in the entrance of your home", if the immersed lemon goes up & floats then that means ನಿಮ್ ಮನೆಗೆ ಯಾರೋ ಕೆಟ್ಟ ದೃಷ್ಟಿ people visited. It was a revolution. Every other home did this, including the shops, hospitals & what not. Oh bars too (someone who goes to the bar said)

Next he said that he told the Reliance industries "ಮನೇಲಿ silver ಗೂಬೆ" ಇಡೋದಕ್ಕೆ. You should have seen the market it created to those small time goldsmiths, I remember ನಮ್ ಅಮ್ಮ ordered for one owl & it took 3 months for delivery. Apparently having owl in the puja-room will expand the heritage.  

He wants ಹೆಂಗಸರು of the house to wake up at 3am. ಸ್ನಾನ ಮಾಡಿ, ಸೀರೆ ಉಟ್ಟು, ತಲೆ ಬಾಚಿ, ಹೂವ ಇಟ್ಟು, ಬಾಗಿಲು ತೊಳೆದು, ರಂಗೋಲಿ ಹಾಕಿ, ದೇವರ ಮನೆ ದೀಪ ಹಚ್ಚಿ, ನಮಸ್ಕಾರ ಮಾಡಬೇಕು. All this within 5am. 

He wants ಗಂಡಸರು of the house to wake up at 5am (2hours extra sleep wow). ಸ್ನಾನ ಮಾಡಿ, you cannot go to puja-room directly with ಸುತ್ತಿರೋ towel, change to ಮಡಿ clothes, do ಪೂಜೆ then ask your wife to fall to your feet, tell ದೀರ್ಘ ಸುಮಂಗಲಿ ಭವ & then you can have ಕಾಫಿ. 

& if your wife serves you coffee in nighty, throw it on her face. Coffee: to be consumed only if wife is wearing ಸೀರೆ. Oh ho, if you are making coffee to your wife means ಅಷ್ಟೆ , ಅವನ ಬೈಗುಳ will make sure you get ರಕ್ತ from your ears. 

Oh someone also said, he has done some special puja, to all who scold him, I think I should stop. Please watch his program for more information (I am sure you wont)

College - Work - Marriage - Kids - Life

Just few years ago the discussions in friends circle was “Oh yel kelsa maadtidhya?”, “How is the pay?”, “Onsite opportunities idhya”.  & these days it’s just “Its baby girl” “How many kgs talks” . I obviously can’t say “Yeh sab kaise hua patha hi nahi chala”, coz its science, its nature, I know, even you should know. 

So after TT, Komi has become a mom, to a lovely baby girl.

New gen chicks have arrived.

I am already dreaming about attending these kiddo’s marriages. *wipes tears*

For further blogpost references the kiddos will be names, “Ruju” (TT’s) & “PunKo” (Komi’s)

I hear that Ruju wakes up whenever I call TT (excuse me, TT knows that cell phone should be in silent mode, that’s not the point). Even when the phone rings in the silent mode, she wakes up. We see a bondage here already.

Oh the boys in the gang are little lagging behind, (yeah blame the government for keeping marriage age of boys a little higher). Both the Ganeshas have let go their bhramacharya & are engaged. One is getting married in Dec & the other in March. Yes your congratulations will be delivered, gifts would have been better.

In other IMPORTANT news, myself & Dummu are visiting the mothers, clicking photos of the kiddos, are publishing to everyone. This is by far the closest we got in terms of “Jana Seve”. I see that no one who saw the pic even made an attempt to say “thanks for the pics”, they are just busy “awwwwww’ing”

P.S: Dummu I am so tempted to write about *that*

  

Being Angry cannot wait

Hello world,

I am back from a refreshing speedy holiday. Witnessing M.Sc race live was the highlight & of course the only reason I was at the debut Indian GP, detailed report on it later.

Before that need to put what happened on our flight back home; there was a guy next to me, dressed all corporate, and looking damn restless. The seat-belt sign & no use of electronic appliances were still on. & the moment air-hostess announced it can be used, he hurried, took his laptop from the cabin, switched on.

Otherwise am a non-intrusive person, I am the one who keeps mom & Pati’s comments of people at bay, but this guy’s impatience made me curious. I wanted to know what on world couldn’t wait for 15mins.

So the laptop was on, & you know what he did? Started playing “Angry Birds”!!! what is this world coming to bhawaan?

One Fire, Different Flames.

Extracts from someone’s diary

I think I was 2 when it caught my eyes. It was bright & moving left & right. Mom was making too many of them, all placed in the tray. I tried going near & dad pulled me back, he was yelling at the top of his voice. I hardly understood elders those days; it was just the orientation of the voice. If they sounded soft, meant they were being mushy, if they sounded loud, it meant I wasn’t supposed to do whatever I tried few seconds back! Ya, so that was the first time I saw that thing.

Next time I saw it I could recognize its color, it was yellow, and I was 4 then. Also understood that I wasn’t supposed to go near it; Benki, was its name.

Few years later, while I watched neighboring kids burst crackers I realized mom wasn’t around. What was around were the deepas, brightly lit. I observed it for sometime; I loved the way it danced, with the wind, I’d seen dad hold his hands around it while ma lighted. I did the same. The dancing stopped & I was happy.

I was bursting crackers the next year, all grown up & proud of holding a “plain-not-chaT-chaT-sursurbathi”. That was also the year when I tried touching it. Like how curiosity killed the cat, it burnt my finger. I was glad though, no homework for 2 weeks.

Few years passed, & I was careful while handling it. One particular year, was I 10, not too sure, I decided I have to touch it & also not burn myself. I asked this younger cousin of mine, he wasn’t too sure; we tried the “taking-mangaLarti” style, didn’t burn but also didn’t touch. That’s when the adventurer within me awoke; I swiped my forefinger through the flame, as fast as I could. Nothing happened. I became my cousin’s hero that day.

Years passed & I was assigned with the task to light them. That also when I told my aunt not to waste match sticks, light a deepa & use it to light rest.

Few more years later they married me off. You are lakshmi of the house, light the deepa, our house & our lives too, told MIL. I giggled with the thought of lighting the house, I mean setting house on fire.  

A year later, phone rang at midnight. Your husband is no more, told the caller. 24hours later, I saw benki engulf him. He did not move, & the fire hovered. 5 minutes & it was over.

100s of deepas in the front yard meant celebration, just one meant sorrow. I gazed at the deepa again, it was not just yellow, and that was just the edges, bright red in the middle & slowly the color faded.

You took away our son, echoed around the house since then. MIL managed to tell everyone who came by, even the maid. Unlucky was what they called me. Next I knew I was poured kerosene, one flick & boom.

 

Attention, Curiosity, Adventure, Sharing, NewLife, Life, Death - One Fire, Different Flames.

 

Of sperms & eggs

I wanted to title this post as “Of Parenting” but then why not give credit to the ones that actually change the status of a couple, to parents, so “Of sperms & eggs”

There are n number of books on “Parenting” in the market, buying them & reading them doesn’t make you a good parent. These books are more like “salt to taste”, “add chilly according to your taste buds” recipes. It’s a gamble, you get them right first time, sometimes not, you learn every day, right from the tricks to treats, & as Aamir Khan says “every child is different”.

We have a pediatrician in the house who counsels adolescent kids, mostly the ones who are entering teens. According to him, more than the kids the parents need counseling. Being an eye witness & victim of an incident yesterday, I am now sure it’s true.

According to what I saw, Parents these days cannot stand their kids cry, the moment their child lets out a tear they go to any extent & fix it. What they do not fix is asking the child to shut up & stop the tears. Over the years, life is going to throw all sorts of stones at them, should they sit & cry on that? Instilling confidence is the first lesson you teach your kid. You don’t need a book to teach that isn’t it?

Life is not about getting married & having a kid before people start bombarding questions, but it’s about knowing that for the rest of your life, every good & decision your child makes, you are directly responsible for that. By the way you raised them, by the way you behaved with them, and by the way you taught them how to solve a problem. I have committed smallest mistakes to biggest blunders in life, & yes my parents are accountable to why I did that. & that is the same accountability I will be giving my kid, whenever that happens. The day I realize I can handle that, is when I decide to fertilize the egg. Period!

Anyways, serious stuff apart, today it’s all about parents, wishing new parents in town guRU & theJU, all the best on their 4kg bundle of joy, their signature i.e. “Ru-Ju” arrived today. More after meeting her.   

 

Happiness is......

• Myself, music & walk in the misty mornings
• Giving 2secs missed calls to mom mostly when she is cleaning
• Random thoughts and creativity pop-ups
• Noodles, funny sitcom & not-studying sister
• Not on phone & at home dad
• New dishes & never-complaining Pati
• Talks about e-family with K-swamy
• Boti palya on mahalaya amavasya
• Grandpa wishing “huttu habbadha shubhashayagaLu”, yes in Kannada on the B’day.

That’s 9 items on the list, & I don’t even believe on that number, anything? anything? Oh wait..

P.S: How can I forget, Me, You, Rides & Latitude

How it all started

Hmm so you celebrate your birthday every year aa? All happy happy khush khushi-li, distributing chocolates, wearing new dress, blowing candles, cutting cakes, visiting temples, throwing parties & what not; good. But have you ever thought the origin of all this?

Ayyo ayyo not the intercourse part, but the fact about what was the main reason you got out of your mom? Yes we are discussing about pain, “its-time-for-the-baby-to-pop-out-pain”.  

While sister grumbled on various instances, she went on night shift just to witness a delivery & no preggie ladies got the pain, mom started her story. “When I was pregnant with you”, she looked in my eyes.

“Eh what did you do as soon as the water broke?” I asked.

Being the typical Monica of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, having cleanliness OCD, first thing she did was take a hot bath it seems. WTH, myself & sis exclaimed.

“Doctors actually advise to pour hot water on tummy, so I thought you never know the kind of water they have in the hospital, sterilized or not. So why not take bath”

See. My mother is such a psycho. There I was, wanting to come out of her belly, see the world, bless everyone with my presence & all she thought was having bath. I guess that’s when I decided, I should seldom have bath.

Then, what happened, sis asked.

“Myself & your grandma, we walked all the way to hospital” she said.

Kindly do not give an OMG, 9 month in pain lady walks to hospital aa, what was the father doing look. It’s just that our house was hardly 500mts from hospital, so it’s obvious that she walked.

& then the doctor gave her fast-pain inducing injections every hour starting from 7pm till 11pm. I am sure I was still pissed off with bath issue that I refused to bulge out. I must have decided “ee vomma is mad only, if I am out wonder how many times she will give me bath” anta. By then the clock stroked 12, date was 30/03, being a palindrome obsessed, and I was out.

Normal delivery is like punarjanma to women, mom sighed. Sis agreed. She even told about two deaths she saw during the delivery time. While we are discussing this, the lovely TT is waiting for the pain, it’s been quite some time, poor soul, that kiddo is sure testing her patience. I wanted to suggest what happens when Rachel doesn’t get the pain, but considering the amount of tube light she is, gave it a pass.

I think I’ll just adopt a kid.

That moment

He looked in her eyes, for the first time. She didn't. 

"Look at me jaan", he said.

She giggled. 

"Nope, its too weird", she continued giggling. 

"You are just scared"

"Of what? Excuse me, I am not"

"Then why? Look at my eyes"

"OK fella. Bring it on"

The Who-blinks-eyelid-first-battle started.

& somewhere in between the fight, it happened.

"that moment"

Food: Kerala Lime Tea

If you are a foodie, this should be your bible, post-meals. It digests food instantly, the right amount of sweetness & sourness is the key, also makes room for that dessert you skipped coz you were full.

In simple words, you could be Joey of Thanksgiving where he eats an entire turkey. If you have a glass of Kerala Lime Tea, that is.

This is what you’ll need for 2 people

Water – 2 glasses

Sugar – 3 table spoons

Lemon extract – 1 table spoon

Tea powder – ½ table spoon

This is how you make it

Boil water & sugar, the longer the better.

When boil starts to thicken, add tea powder & switch off stove. The tea powder is just for the color & a slight texture.

Add lemon & sieve.

Well, you could serve or drink on your own. Yes both the glasses that you made, thank you!

Mother India - Bharathi

Bharu,

 

47years huh??

 

Of being a naughty daughter during childhood & supportive daughter when grandma/grandpa lost their son.

Of being a happy sister, throwing akshathe during bro’s engagement & putting akki kaaLu during bro’s death.

Of being a lovey-dovey girl friend of a young hot-tempered guy since childhood, taking care of still hot-tempered man during mid-life crisis and raising two lovely daughters with still hot-tempered husband.

Of being a mom of two totally weird souls, both different physically/emotionally/psychologically & balancing between biased accusations.

Of being amma to no-talks-always-shy-aLiya and now non-stop-chit-chats aLiya.

Of being a responsible elder daughter in law of a still-together family of 25

Of being mentor, guide, agony aunt to everyone inside & outside the household.

Of being news feeder to all the no access to live news people

Of being a humble mistress to all the maids in the house

 

You have done it all. It isn’t that easy, not easy at all.

 

It is that enthusiasm. That urge to know everything that’s happening around. You make sure you seek interest in all our interests, so that you are always in conversation.

It is that diplomacy. That ability to solve conflicts between people. You make sure everyone around is at peace.

It is that patience. That ability to handle dad with ease. Everyone who knows dad will definitely agree without any doubt.

All the above are what you we all adore you for Bharu.

 

You must be wondering what I am not addressing you as “miiii”. That’s because this letter is about what an amazing person you are irrespective of being my mother.

 

Happy Birthday from all of us whose lives you have touched.

Always stay the same, same as Monica from F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

 

P.S: Yes, soon.

 

 

 

Film: Paramaathma

Two pre-conditions before you go to watch “Paramaathma”

Puneeth is not Ganesh is not Diganth

Paramaathma Yograj is not Pancharangi Yograj is not MungaaruMale Yograj

OK you are good now, you can go. Except if you want to hear my review.

Time & again I have realized one thing about hyped movies. They just fail. Fail & how, miserably. What I have also realized is I never give up hope. That one day a much hyped movie will make it, to the blockbuster category.

 

The Story

 

1.      Puneeth is “Param” a.k.a “Teddy” a.k.a “KaraDi” who fails M.Sc 5 times (not sure why), who climbed graphical Everest & planted a flag (not sure why), then went to Bombay made friends with yeLneeru guy who gave him tips so he makes money (not sure why), then becomes fat, someone asked him to learn Kung-Fu so he goes to China to learn (not sure why), then gets philosophical goes to Nepal, asks “yeh life kaiku?”, they give him one bidhirina dabba attached with enema tube sorts something, allaDisu & this is your answer they say, he does many times & we hear rumbling sound (not sure why errr also what) who is now telling story to “Paseena Paseena” a.k.a Aindritha Roy which she already knows.

2.      In the story, entry AnathNag, who is a cardiologist who checks whether his son Param’s heart is the same since he was born? Yes magane, yes, he yells most of the times having a squirrel in his hand (not sure why)

3.      Param has 5 more dubaaku friends who just help in his dialogue delivery; oh they have dubaaku names also like “muthaidhe”, “kaDlebeLe” array bere I forgot.

4.      Param meets Deepa in a movie theatre; both of them fall asleep while the movie is on, just like Pati did while Paramaathma was going on. Bomb scare, friends almost pinch Param but he doesn’t wake up (not sure why), but when called on his cell phone he wakes, he is running out & sees Deepa sleeping, wakes her & says “Bomb”, she starts running in opposite direction of the exit (not sure why), her leg gets struck to one chair, Param cant leave onTi girl so breaks chair & now she cant run, so lifts her & gets her out. Media calls them “PremigaLu”

5.      Avinash a.k.a Deepa’s dad is unhappy. Her 7 instruments barsing daughter’s maana is harajed. Param & his dad also aren’t happy so they go visit Deepa’s house, ask sorry, she is building one model house which Param gets home along with her visiting card.

6.      Param calls “Thithi VaDe” a.k.a Deepa everyday & she cancels “Nusi PeeDe” a.k.a Param’s call everyday (not sure, hello I know this, Love start adke)

7.      One fine day, Param clicks Deepa’s picture during her concert & she gets distracted, & her dad smacks her, sends her off to haLLi (not sure why)

8.      Param follows her, sings one song in the journey and reaches her home even before she does (not sure how) Oh also kisses her in random on her cheeks

9.      Start Deepa uncontrollable laughter (not sure why) to such an extent that it gets on audiences nerves.

10.  He kisses her again, sleeps on her lap, she assumes he is asleep, kisses him on his cheeks whole night, run some mud race with she biting him(not sure why), then elders agree & they are ready to get married

11.  Entry Paseena Paseena, karaDi song, I want you I want you scenes, He saying No You cant No You cant scenes, she crying & leaving Param. Deepa watching & saying “you can hurt her means you can hurt me also, go I don’t want you” scenes

12.  Param coming home & starts building home that she built as model, meanwhile Deepa comes back after viraha & marriage happens. Then start Param laughing uncontrollably (not sure why)

13.  Baby happens (not sure, array marriage ke baad what else will happen) & baby calls appa first, they are happy again, they sleep with baby on tree house, then Deepa dies. Too much happiness will lead to heart attack says cardiologist.

14.  Paseena Paseena is wiping tears now after story over, she is marrying someone else, Param is taking care of baby.

 

The End.

Why is this movie so bad? Yavanig Gothuuuuuuuuu.

 

Yuwaaaaaah Dasara 2011

One of those back home early, what to do situations yesterday & we decided why not witness “Yuva Dasara 2011”. It was Udit Narayan who was performing & Pati didn’t even know how he looked. I told him “looks doesn’t matter, it’s his uncle voice that’s famous. MTV Subbulakshmi ge & Kunidhu Kunidhu bare gothilwa. Let’s go” & we went.

By the time we reached the venue, it was full. Thanks to mom & sis & their two kerchiefs, we had chairs. The MCs were yelling at the top of their voice, I guess they forgot the whole functionality of the mikes. That’s when I started missing cotton; my ears shouted “Pain Pain”.

Just when I comforted my ear, my nose started the trouble. There was booze all around. It was the samithi guys, they were totally drunk. There is no point in having security checks at the entrances, they could have alcoholmeter instead. Next to mom sat a paDDe huDga, who got excited every time lights blinked, music started, MCs spoke, participants dances, well basically he never sat still, got up & danced like a maniac, he wanted the camera to focus him, he even made calls to someone complaining he wasn’t being focused. Mom sat at the edge of her chair, not excited but he was dancing like a weirdo. This happened at the second row mind you, the VVIP stand. I wonder how these porkis get access to such passes.

The dances happened. Only act that was mesmerizing was a number from SDM MMK College, they performed Ramayana with utmost grace. Rest, not worth discussing!!! Apparently all the dance programs were done & it was 8:00pm, no trace of Udit Narayan. These MCs had no script for fillers, I am sure they didn’t even know what filler was. Then they started to keep the audience at bay by singing songs, & mental audience danced even at MCs songs.

& then came the troop, they were supposed to be best musicians from Delhi. They just did one thing, killed music. If Gurukiran heard the song, he would have taken one MCs dupatta & hanged himself. They were that bad. It was 8:35pm & one Radio Jockey from Rainbow started the show with “Mysoruuuuuuu hegide?” The monitors displayed “Do You Rock”, sis said “No I roll you idiots. The songs are making my tears roll”.

She wore noodle strap salwar, & the bayyys were least bothered what she spoke. Then started the show at 8L45pm, with some random singer who sang “Neele Neele ambar”, he was good. Better than Udit, anytime. Then there was some SaReGaMaPa Rokthima girl. It was 9pm & still no sign was Udit.

Then started “PaPa Kehthe Hai”, Udit was out but wasn’t singing. Loser was lip syncing. & for the rest of the songs that he sang, whichever involved taking a high pitch, he never sang. Like it wasn’t “Jadoooooo teri Nazar Khushbooooo tera badan” but it was “Jadu teri nazar Khushbu tera badan”. Get the point?

Well Well the worst was yet to come. After a few hindi songs, the crowd strated yelling Kannada Kannada & he sang “MTV Subbulakshmi ge”. Even the porki who was still dancing would have sung that much better. Isn’t that obvious when he is performing in Karnataka, he has to rehearse the song at least once. The music was bad, so was his pronunciation and the raaaga. Then came the shocker, “Kunidhu Kunidhu Baare”, it kole. Kannada dha kole. I have seen Kunal Ganjawaala’s show, Hariharan’s show, Shreya Goshal’s show, none this bad. Everyone had done their homework with few Kannada songs that they planned to sing. They are just wasting money, our money.

Get Vijay Prakash, Get Raghu Dixit, Get M.D.Pallavi, better still get the budding singers, audience don’t need big stars, they just need entertainment, & they are Kannadigas, they will embrace any form of talent, even if its low profile.

 

Dining Table Tales

You all should stop judging police. That they are pot bellied, drink, smoke, play cards and aren’t fit. That’s not the truth; that’s so not the truth. Have you seen my dad? He is fit like a boy in his teens & of course he doesn’t do any of those good habits. I even heard someone tell him, “Ni yentha Police, yav keTTa abyasanu illa, hogLi police bhashenu upyogsalla”

Staying fit is probably his only motto in life. Oh wait, I forgot to mention, he is a veggie. Yeah you heard that right, veggie Gowda. I guess when I told the same Pati almost fainted. & for fitness his regime consists of 5kms run in the morning & 2kms in the evening.

Here is the diet *burrpppp* eh this mutton saaru, excuse me

 

7am – a glass of bottleguard juice + a bowl of papaya

8:30am – no rice item, no coconut oriented breakfast

11am – tender coconut

1pm – mudhe + saaru, a bowl of rice & a dry vegetable palya

4pm – a glass of pomegranate juice

8:30pm – a bowl of boiled vegetables, chapathi/roti along with a palya

9pm – Neer Majjige

 

No milk, no coffee, no tea, no sweets, no snacks, no chakli, no koDbaLe, well well NO LIFE

With rest of the family its chicken for breakfast, mutton for lunch & fish for dinner. Oh we also fit some prawns in between. Except Vatti who tries to have everything with a spoon & fails miserably.

 

P.S: What’s in ahara meLa this time huh?

 

 

Bon anniversaire

& I am happy again; wasn’t I till now you might question. I was, can’t deny that, but this happiness is magical, not laughing hard sorts happiness, its that muguLu nage sorts happiness, that smile you steal when you are alone or even when there are tons of people around, for no reason, yeah that sort of happiness.

I am back to being myself again. That mental girl who was lost somewhere between 2008 till now, trying to change, adapt to people around, letting go her identity of psychic enthusiasm, yo she is back.

All thanks to Hassle-Free conversations!!! & this post had to be published today, on the date that has been part of the passwords these days, an ode to Edison; with the invention of light bulb he lighted everybody’s life, especially mine.

 

When RED

Is when we stop. Yes, that's right, that's when we stop at the junction. But in those 120-180secs what do you do?

Do you just wait?
Do you talk with people whom you are with?
Do you buy things that they sell there? Earbuds, wiping cloth, flags et el?
Do you listen to music?
Do you raise your window pane when beggars ask money?

I look. Look, not stare. I look at passengers in the auto. I see couple in the car & see if they are waiting. I watch anxiety in the eyes of not helmet wearing two wheelers. I look, observe.

Thats what I do.

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Lux Kya Scene Hai

Top 3 Bollywood situations that leads to (at least they think) getting laid.

In no particular order

 

• Hero & Heroine together are washing car/bike, & out of blue heroine decides to throw water on the hero. Hero is all wet; he yells “array rukh tujhe dikha tha hoon (Huh? Hame bhi tho dikhao)” & chases the heroine who by now is indoors, actually bedroom. He gets her & start music (imagine Sharukh playing virtual piano in KKHH during rain sequence in summer camp) & tadaaa it happens
• Heroine has dreadful cold & the couple is far away from the reach to doctors. She is shivering, & will die if there is no sufficient heat provided & our hero has no other go but to heat her, start music (high pitch drums banging) & tadaaaa it happens
• Sharaab. This sure is only situation close to reality, but silly directors’ use as part of comedy phase of the movie. Take DDLJ for that matter, “Senorite, tum nashe mein thi aur mein bhi apne aap ko rokh nahi paaya, aur bas samkjo sab kuch hogaya”.